Some of the 10 most profitable U.S. law firms in the country have essentially no presence on Twitter.
They include Quinn Emanuel Urquhart & Sullivan,…
Tuesday, May 31, 2016
Many of the most-profitable law firms have little presence on Twitter
What I Wrote In Lipstick On My Bedroom Mirror After Divorce
If there's ever a time you need a little distraction in your life, it's during the divorce process. That's why we launched our Divorce Care Package series. With each post, we'll show you what things - books, movies, recipes - helped others relieve stress in the midst of divorce, in the hopes that a few of their picks will serve you well too. Want to share what got you through your divorce? Email us at divorce@huffingtonpost.com.
Lifestyle blogger and mom of three Chrystie Vachon spends her days teaching parents how to build their blogging empires while their kiddos sleep.
Seven years ago, though, her blog posts were about something something quite different. Newly divorced after seven years of marriage, Vachon began sharing heartfelt essays about splitting up, co-parenting and life as a single mom.
Below, the since-remarried blogger shares five things that helped her heal after divorce, including writing through the heartbreak.
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
Take the ABA's weekly 'know it all' news quiz
Do you fancy yourself the legal news guru around the office? Do you enjoy trivia? Are you interested in companywide bragging rights? If you answered…
20160531 - Some Politicians Want to Stop the Police From Taking Your Stuff
Some Politicians Want to Stop the Police From Taking Your Stuff
May 27, 2016
by Rebecca McCray, TakePart
2016-05-27
Patent Settlements in the Pharmaceutical Industry: What Can We Learn from Economic Analysis?
Jonas Severin Frank, Philipps University Marburg - Faculty of Business Administration and Economics and Wolfgang Kerber, Philipps University Marburg - School of Business Administration and Economics discuss Patent Settlements in the Pharmaceutical Industry: What Can We Learn from Economic Analysis?...
20 Perks of Being a Single Mom to a Toddler in your 20s or 30s
There's no doubt that becoming or being a single mom in your 20s can be intimidating, terrifying, and make you feel like less of the "normal" family/parenting unit, but, that being said, it's one of the most rewarding, remarkable journeys a person can embark on. Raising one munchkin solo can have it's perks, and here are a handful of them...
1. While all your other mama friends are keeping the "2 under 2" statistic alive, you don't have to worry about basically being pregnant and nursing for like 5 years in a row.
2. You don't have to worry about losing baby weight from baby #2, because instead of being pregnant again, you're chasing after your toddler solo, crushing the "mom-bod" with nice legs and abs instead of milk-filled DDs and a newborn on your chest.
3. You can go to happy hour or a night out on the town and actually enjoy a drink or two, because you don't have to get home and nurse a newborn, or pump and dump for an entire day. and, you're most likely guaranteed snuggles from a little 3' rascal who probably snuck into your bed with the sitter while you were out.
4. No double-stroller over here! Thank goodness -- have you felt how heavy and chunky those bad boys are?! Not to mention how full our car trunks already are anyway.
5. You can go on adventures with your mini without needing doubles of everything for another kid . One carseat? Check. One set of snacks? Check. Only one shared bag packed with essentials and goodies? Check. One set of hands to cuddle up your munchkin? Check.
6. You're still a babe, so you can actually look forward to dating instead of being scared of it and feeling "old" -- I mean, it is 2016, so who are we kidding? It's still terrifying thanks to online dating and this odd generation of nonchalant gypsy "men", but at least you're still young, fun, and confident - even being a single mama. Which what isn't to admire about that? You're strong, independent, and clearly hardworking, so those are major turn-ons.
7. You don't have a big pregnant belly, so don't have to worry about not being able to give your little one unlimited sit-on-my-lap snuggles and cuddles during story-time or bedtime, and you can still crouch over the tub.
8. You're forced to be social and go on play dates, because you don't have another sibling to help entertain your high-energy-filled little love bug monster
9. You only have two mouths to feed, so you don't have to cook or grocery shop for an entire tribe
10. Special night-time snuggles build an extra-special mama-child bond, because all your unconditional love and energy is poured into one tiny human, and doesn't have to be divided
11. The only one telling you "no" is your tiny, independent nugget, not a spouse
12. You still have a roomie to keep you company, and maybe even a bed-sharing one at that. Snuggles and cuddles from a toddler > a bed-sharing partner who doesn't want a tot invading.
13. You take pride in EVERYTHING. Because you're the one responsible for the milestones, no matter how big or how small. and you don't have to pick a favorite child.
14. When your little one goes to bed, you actually get a couple seconds to yourself. You can dive into a book, a chic flick, or fulfill hobbies and enjoy peaceful "me time."
15. You really value your friends and your family for their love and support. Without them you wouldn't survive since you don't have a parter's help with daily tasks that seem simple when split between two sets of hands, legs, eyes and ears. Your nugget feels extra special and loved by your family and friends, because all of the attention is on them. They don't have to feel jealous or compete with a sibling (yet).
16. Want to redecorate the house or rearrange furniture? Your toddler won't care or judge you for it. In fact, they'll probably want to be a big helper and dive in, excited. When's the last time a spouse was overjoyed to help you hang new photos or go pick our new bedding? Pretty sure little helping hands think it's the coolest thing ever getting to be your assistant.
17. "Mommy, I want a smoothie and mac-n-cheese for dinner!" Easiest meal prep and clean up ever? Check. Not having to prepare steak and potatoes for your other half who would never be satisfied with just that? Check. Dinner for two, and an excuse to eat macaroni and cheese? Check.
18. You get to share your laundry piles and closets with clothes that could fit a doll, instead of clothes that take up the entire hamper, all the hangers, and all your time washing, drying, folding, and putting away.
19. To your mini me, you are superwoman. You are beautiful, fun, kind, and special. Although plenty of days they will make you feel tested and exhausted and question your sanity, at the end of the day, they will give you kisses and sweet hugs, and love you for you.
20. Weekends can be filled with... whatever you want them to be. Want to make pancakes from scratch in your PJs, then cuddle up on the couch to eat breakfast and watch cartoons? You can, and you can take as long as you please. Want to create things and go on adventures with no timelines, wifey duties to fulfill, or putting someone else's needs before your nugget? Yes, please. Just you + your little and the entire day and weekend ahead to go and do as you wish.
1. While all your other mama friends are keeping the "2 under 2" statistic alive, you don't have to worry about basically being pregnant and nursing for like 5 years in a row.
2. You don't have to worry about losing baby weight from baby #2, because instead of being pregnant again, you're chasing after your toddler solo, crushing the "mom-bod" with nice legs and abs instead of milk-filled DDs and a newborn on your chest.
3. You can go to happy hour or a night out on the town and actually enjoy a drink or two, because you don't have to get home and nurse a newborn, or pump and dump for an entire day. and, you're most likely guaranteed snuggles from a little 3' rascal who probably snuck into your bed with the sitter while you were out.
4. No double-stroller over here! Thank goodness -- have you felt how heavy and chunky those bad boys are?! Not to mention how full our car trunks already are anyway.
5. You can go on adventures with your mini without needing doubles of everything for another kid . One carseat? Check. One set of snacks? Check. Only one shared bag packed with essentials and goodies? Check. One set of hands to cuddle up your munchkin? Check.
6. You're still a babe, so you can actually look forward to dating instead of being scared of it and feeling "old" -- I mean, it is 2016, so who are we kidding? It's still terrifying thanks to online dating and this odd generation of nonchalant gypsy "men", but at least you're still young, fun, and confident - even being a single mama. Which what isn't to admire about that? You're strong, independent, and clearly hardworking, so those are major turn-ons.
7. You don't have a big pregnant belly, so don't have to worry about not being able to give your little one unlimited sit-on-my-lap snuggles and cuddles during story-time or bedtime, and you can still crouch over the tub.
8. You're forced to be social and go on play dates, because you don't have another sibling to help entertain your high-energy-filled little love bug monster
9. You only have two mouths to feed, so you don't have to cook or grocery shop for an entire tribe
10. Special night-time snuggles build an extra-special mama-child bond, because all your unconditional love and energy is poured into one tiny human, and doesn't have to be divided
11. The only one telling you "no" is your tiny, independent nugget, not a spouse
12. You still have a roomie to keep you company, and maybe even a bed-sharing one at that. Snuggles and cuddles from a toddler > a bed-sharing partner who doesn't want a tot invading.
13. You take pride in EVERYTHING. Because you're the one responsible for the milestones, no matter how big or how small. and you don't have to pick a favorite child.
14. When your little one goes to bed, you actually get a couple seconds to yourself. You can dive into a book, a chic flick, or fulfill hobbies and enjoy peaceful "me time."
15. You really value your friends and your family for their love and support. Without them you wouldn't survive since you don't have a parter's help with daily tasks that seem simple when split between two sets of hands, legs, eyes and ears. Your nugget feels extra special and loved by your family and friends, because all of the attention is on them. They don't have to feel jealous or compete with a sibling (yet).
16. Want to redecorate the house or rearrange furniture? Your toddler won't care or judge you for it. In fact, they'll probably want to be a big helper and dive in, excited. When's the last time a spouse was overjoyed to help you hang new photos or go pick our new bedding? Pretty sure little helping hands think it's the coolest thing ever getting to be your assistant.
17. "Mommy, I want a smoothie and mac-n-cheese for dinner!" Easiest meal prep and clean up ever? Check. Not having to prepare steak and potatoes for your other half who would never be satisfied with just that? Check. Dinner for two, and an excuse to eat macaroni and cheese? Check.
18. You get to share your laundry piles and closets with clothes that could fit a doll, instead of clothes that take up the entire hamper, all the hangers, and all your time washing, drying, folding, and putting away.
19. To your mini me, you are superwoman. You are beautiful, fun, kind, and special. Although plenty of days they will make you feel tested and exhausted and question your sanity, at the end of the day, they will give you kisses and sweet hugs, and love you for you.
20. Weekends can be filled with... whatever you want them to be. Want to make pancakes from scratch in your PJs, then cuddle up on the couch to eat breakfast and watch cartoons? You can, and you can take as long as you please. Want to create things and go on adventures with no timelines, wifey duties to fulfill, or putting someone else's needs before your nugget? Yes, please. Just you + your little and the entire day and weekend ahead to go and do as you wish.
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
Top 5 Military Law Issues
After celebrating Memorial Day and honoring those who died serving in the nation's armed forces, many may be wondering how the military and the legal system interact. In some cases, like the court martial process, the military has its own...
Monday, May 30, 2016
FRAND in India: Emerging Developments
Kirti Gupta, Qualcomm provides FRAND in India: Emerging Developments. ABSTRACT: There is an ongoing debate about the Intellectual Property Rights (“IPR”) policies of major Standard Setting Organizations (“SSOs”) and how the licensing disputes related to the valuation of IPR related...
Divorced Dad Tries Paying Child Support With Pizza, And Court Is Cool With It
An Italian court has acquitted a divorced father who offered to pay child support with pizza.
When Nicola Toso split from his wife Nicoletta Zuin in 2002, he agreed to pay child support for their daughter, who was then 6 years old, according to the Daily Telegraph. The local Il Gazzettino newspaper reported that the amount was 300 euros, or about $335, per month.
But when a crippling recession struck the southern European country in 2008, the 50-year-old professional pizza maker from Padua could no longer afford to hand over the support in cold, hard cash.
Instead, he offered to stump up the equivalent sum in the form of pies, calzones and other meals made by his take-away business.
"In lieu of money, the defendant offered his ex-wife the same amount of compensation in the form of take-away pizzas from his workplace, an offer promptly rejected as 'beggar's change,'" said Judge Chiara Bitozzi in her ruling.
According to the Independent, Toso went on to remarry and have three more children. He shuttered his business in 2010, which is when Zuin filed a criminal complaint against him, alleging non-payment of child support. It culminated in a criminal case, which was heard at a courthouse in Padua last week.
Toso's defense attorney argued that, despite enduring extremely tough times, he'd still fulfilled all his other custody obligations and even taken in his daughter in 2011 when her relationship with her mother broke down -- after which Zuin was then supposed to pay 300 euros per month in maintenance to Toso.
Judge Bitozzi found there was no evidence of any crime being committed, and Toso was acquitted.
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
Friday, May 27, 2016
US to seek death penalty in hate-crimes case against accused Charleston church shooter, Dylann Roof
Attorney General Loretta Lynch announced Tuesday that the United States will seek the death penalty in its hate-crimes case against Dylann Roof, the 22-year-old…
Can I Hire a Family Member to Be My Lawyer?
If you have a legal issue, it's only natural to ask the lawyer in the family some questions. Whether you want to hire family as counsel is another matter, however, and one to consider carefully. There are advantages to...
Amber Heard Granted Restraining Order Against Johnny Depp, Says She's A Victim Of Domestic Violence (UPDATE)
A Los Angeles judge granted Amber Heard a temporary restraining order against Johnny Depp on Friday, after she claimed she was a repeated victim of domestic violence.
The 30-year-old actress filed for divorce from Depp on Monday and TMZ was the first to report that she showed up to court with her lawyer on Friday, armed with photos she claims show bruises that the 52-year-old actor gave her during the course of their relationship.
Requests for comment made by The Huffington Post to Heard's rep and lawyer were not immediately returned. Request for comment made to Depp's rep was also not immediately returned.
On Thursday, Depp's rep gave a statement to Us Weekly regarding his split from Heard, expressing that he did not want to drag out the divorce:
“Given the brevity of this marriage and the most recent and tragic loss of his mother, Johnny will not respond to any of the salacious false stories, gossip, misinformation and lies about his personal life,” Depp's rep said. “Hopefully the dissolution of this short marriage will be resolved quickly.”
Note: This post has been updated to reflect that a judge granted Heard a temporary restraining order against Depp.
Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) for the National Domestic Violence Hotline or visit the National Sexual Assault Online Hotline operated by RAINN. For more resources, visit the National Sexual Violence Resource Center's website.
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
Modifying Merger Consent Decrees: An Economist Plot to Improve Merger Enforcement Policy
Steve Salop, Georgetown discusses Modifying Merger Consent Decrees: An Economist Plot to Improve Merger Enforcement Policy. ABSTRACT: This short article analyzes a proposal that merger consent decrees should include a review and modification provision that would give the agency the...
Longtime lawyer pleads guilty in $33.6M real-estate fraud involving bogus court filings
In recent years, a number of real estate lawyers have been embroiled in mortgage fraud cases.
But Arizona attorney Jeffrey Greenberg went farther than most,…
Law and Economics Scholarship and Supreme Court Antitrust Jurisprudence, 1950-2010
Camden Hutchison, University of Wisconsin has written on Law and Economics Scholarship and Supreme Court Antitrust Jurisprudence, 1950-2010. ABSTRACT: Although law and economics has influenced nearly every area of American law, few have been as deeply and as thoroughly "economized"...
An Open Letter to the Good Guys with 5 Tips from the Bad Boys
Dear Good Guy...
I've met a lot of you, well, at least the ones who aren't hiding away and trying to convince themselves they love the single life after giving up on dating. And I've met a lot of the ones you and others would call the "Bad Boys!" You're resentful (and jealous) of those guys always getting the girl when you know you're great boyfriend material. I get it.
Listen, it's not that we think the Bad Boys are better than the Good Guys because we know they aren't going to be permanent in our lives. The thing is, they understand what we need and want and are willing to risk rejection in hopes of giving it to us. You can do this too without changing your values or faking it until you make it while being genuinely and wonderfully YOU. So step away from the home improvement projects that you're using to distract you on lonely nights and take the lessons shared here so you can get the girl.
What do the Bad Boys do that you aren't doing?
1. They Text
No one is a good dater in this day and age (regardless of your age) without making the smartphone your friend. My number one message to men who ask me for advice is to learn to build and maintain momentum with women... this is why texting is your Friend, not your Enemy! The Bad Boys know, no matter how long we've known them, that we love that "Good Morning" text... we love hearing you are thinking of us during the day... and we love your "sweet dreams" text as we drift off to sleep! This work for you not only because women love knowing you're thinking about them, but it keeps YOU at the forefront of their minds, too!
2. They Flirt
The Bad Boys always compliment where they can but never in a fake way. They also know how to tease in a way that makes a girl tease back... and that banter is a huge turn-on. They also know how to give a little sexual innuendo without being sexually overt. In fact, none of the Bad Boys I know have ever sent me a dick pic... the good guys, however, have more times than I can count. The Bad Boys will also open the door for a sexual entendre and then see what the girl does with it. If she plays along, great and if not, he doesn't push, he just keeps up the rest of the banter until she's comfortable.
3. They Pursue
The Bad Boys strike while the iron is hot. These are the online guys who are going to ask us out right away... they aren't going to coyly say we should really meet without immediately asking what day works for us. They don't listen to the pickup artist guys who say to not show interest or respond to messages quickly... they're interested and not afraid to show it. Life is too full of great women to play games. The Bad Boys are going to text or call every day without getting discouraged if we can't meet the day they originally hoped. They are willing to plan and plan ahead and aren't the last-minute guy unless she says that is all that works on her end. In other words, they don't give up the chase!
4. They know what they want
They want us... and that doesn't scare them. They know that with any risk, rejection is possible without being personal, but not asking is already a rejection they created themselves. They aren't afraid to say what kind of relationship they are interested in or that they are so attracted to you because of your brain, hair, legs or spirit. I find most Good Guys like you, overthink every. damn. thing! Overthinking isn't sexy. Taking liberties when you want something is! If you read some of the work of Esther Perel, she talks about the man 'taking', as an act of aggression, being key to a woman feeling desired. Sure, we want long and slow love-making sometimes, but what we fantasize about more often is you walking in the door and just taking us.
5. They love women
This will come to a great surprise to many of you. It will also surprise you that a lot of the Good Guys have a chip on their shoulder against women. But the Bad Boys simply love women. Now there is a difference between a womanizer (a pickup artist who loves a 'pump and dump', insulting women to get them into bed and trying to fill their own insecurities with notches on their bedpost) and a lover of women. A lover of women will never have a "type" because they can find things to appreciate about many different types. This love comes out in the way they treat us, the way they respect us and the way they have sex with us. There is a certain reverence that allows them to walk in their masculinity and us to walk in and be appreciated for our femininity.
And trust me, Good Guys, when we are on dates with you, not only do we wonder about your confidence and self-esteem if you aren't doing these things, we also wonder about your opinion of women in general. We can feel seething disdain no matter how well you thinking you're hiding it from us or even, yourself.
So, Good Guys of the world, don't change your values or what you have to offer once you get into a relationship, but add these tips to your method. Make a mind shift about women and remember you have the advantage of pure motives with an eye on long-term relationships as a prize. Keep at it and I just bet, the amazing women that you are seeking are going to be giddy when they see they have a Good Morning text from you!
Lovingly,
Single women who want to be chased by Good Guys
I've met a lot of you, well, at least the ones who aren't hiding away and trying to convince themselves they love the single life after giving up on dating. And I've met a lot of the ones you and others would call the "Bad Boys!" You're resentful (and jealous) of those guys always getting the girl when you know you're great boyfriend material. I get it.
Listen, it's not that we think the Bad Boys are better than the Good Guys because we know they aren't going to be permanent in our lives. The thing is, they understand what we need and want and are willing to risk rejection in hopes of giving it to us. You can do this too without changing your values or faking it until you make it while being genuinely and wonderfully YOU. So step away from the home improvement projects that you're using to distract you on lonely nights and take the lessons shared here so you can get the girl.
What do the Bad Boys do that you aren't doing?
1. They Text
No one is a good dater in this day and age (regardless of your age) without making the smartphone your friend. My number one message to men who ask me for advice is to learn to build and maintain momentum with women... this is why texting is your Friend, not your Enemy! The Bad Boys know, no matter how long we've known them, that we love that "Good Morning" text... we love hearing you are thinking of us during the day... and we love your "sweet dreams" text as we drift off to sleep! This work for you not only because women love knowing you're thinking about them, but it keeps YOU at the forefront of their minds, too!
2. They Flirt
The Bad Boys always compliment where they can but never in a fake way. They also know how to tease in a way that makes a girl tease back... and that banter is a huge turn-on. They also know how to give a little sexual innuendo without being sexually overt. In fact, none of the Bad Boys I know have ever sent me a dick pic... the good guys, however, have more times than I can count. The Bad Boys will also open the door for a sexual entendre and then see what the girl does with it. If she plays along, great and if not, he doesn't push, he just keeps up the rest of the banter until she's comfortable.
3. They Pursue
The Bad Boys strike while the iron is hot. These are the online guys who are going to ask us out right away... they aren't going to coyly say we should really meet without immediately asking what day works for us. They don't listen to the pickup artist guys who say to not show interest or respond to messages quickly... they're interested and not afraid to show it. Life is too full of great women to play games. The Bad Boys are going to text or call every day without getting discouraged if we can't meet the day they originally hoped. They are willing to plan and plan ahead and aren't the last-minute guy unless she says that is all that works on her end. In other words, they don't give up the chase!
4. They know what they want
They want us... and that doesn't scare them. They know that with any risk, rejection is possible without being personal, but not asking is already a rejection they created themselves. They aren't afraid to say what kind of relationship they are interested in or that they are so attracted to you because of your brain, hair, legs or spirit. I find most Good Guys like you, overthink every. damn. thing! Overthinking isn't sexy. Taking liberties when you want something is! If you read some of the work of Esther Perel, she talks about the man 'taking', as an act of aggression, being key to a woman feeling desired. Sure, we want long and slow love-making sometimes, but what we fantasize about more often is you walking in the door and just taking us.
5. They love women
This will come to a great surprise to many of you. It will also surprise you that a lot of the Good Guys have a chip on their shoulder against women. But the Bad Boys simply love women. Now there is a difference between a womanizer (a pickup artist who loves a 'pump and dump', insulting women to get them into bed and trying to fill their own insecurities with notches on their bedpost) and a lover of women. A lover of women will never have a "type" because they can find things to appreciate about many different types. This love comes out in the way they treat us, the way they respect us and the way they have sex with us. There is a certain reverence that allows them to walk in their masculinity and us to walk in and be appreciated for our femininity.
And trust me, Good Guys, when we are on dates with you, not only do we wonder about your confidence and self-esteem if you aren't doing these things, we also wonder about your opinion of women in general. We can feel seething disdain no matter how well you thinking you're hiding it from us or even, yourself.
So, Good Guys of the world, don't change your values or what you have to offer once you get into a relationship, but add these tips to your method. Make a mind shift about women and remember you have the advantage of pure motives with an eye on long-term relationships as a prize. Keep at it and I just bet, the amazing women that you are seeking are going to be giddy when they see they have a Good Morning text from you!
Lovingly,
Single women who want to be chased by Good Guys
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
Top 5 Child Abuse and Reporting Questions
Child abuse can manifest in physical, sexual, emotional, or psychological cruelty, or a combination of these. States define abuse in statutes, and there may be some variation in the wording of the law from place to place, but all states...
11 states sue feds over new guidelines for restroom and locker room use by transgender individuals
It isn't just in Illinois and North Carolina that new standards concerning restroom and locker room use by transgender students in schools that…
20160525 - Oklahoma's Insane Rush to Execute
Oklahoma's Insane Rush to Execute
May 25, 2016
by Liliana Segura and Jordan Smith, The Intercept
2016-05-25
Johnny Depp, Amber Heard To Divorce
Actress Amber Heard has filed for divorce from Johnny Depp after 15 months of marriage, citing irreconcilable differences.
Heard's filing on Monday followed the May 20 death of Depp's mother, according to TMZ. People magazine confirmed the divorce petition.
Depp, 52, met Heard, 30, on the set of the 2011 film, "The Rum Diary." They married in February 2015.
The divorce filing follows months of speculation about a spilt. Heard acknowledged the challenges of her marriage to Marie Claire in December.
"I try not to react to the horrible misrepresentation of our lives, but it is strange, and hard,” she said.
Representatives for the couple did not immediately reply to requests for comment.
Last month, Depp and Heard appeared in an awkward video publicly apologizing for bringing dogs into Australia illegally.
This would be Depp's second divorce. A marriage to Lori Anne Allison ended in 1985.
Prior to meeting Heard, Depp had a 14-year relationship with actress Vanessa Paradis. They have two children together. Depp also had a relationship with model Kate Moss for several years.
The divorce filing comes just days before the release of Depp's latest film, "Alice Through the Looking Glass," in which he plays the Mad Hatter.
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
European Commission appoints Tommaso Valletti as new Chief Economist of DG Competition
Congratulations to Imperial College Business School Professor Tommaso Valletti who was just appointed as new DG Competition Chief Economist. According to the press release: The European Commission has appointed Professor Tommaso Valletti as the new Chief Economist of the Directorate...
4 Things You Must Do to Protect Yourself From Going Bankrupt in a Divorce
Don't use the legal process as a weapon to try to get even with your spouse.
When we're hurt or betrayed, our natural reaction is to get angry. So if your marriage is ending in divorce, it's perfectly normal to feel anger, resentment - even hatred for your spouse. And it can be very tempting to turn your divorce into a war and punish your spouse by trying to take them for all they're worth.
But even though it might make you feel powerful and vindicated, the truth is, attempting to use the legal process as a weapon to exact revenge on your soon-to-be-ex is not a good idea - no matter how angry you may be feeling right now.
If you're thinking of going this route, plan on bankrupting yourself financially and emotionally because you'll spend up to $200,000 and waste two to three years of your life fighting this battle.
Money better spent buying out the house or saving for your retirement and time better spent with your children attending their soccer games and helping them with their homework.
So how can you move past the way you're feeling so that you can avoid this terrible fate?
One way is to work with a divorce coach or a therapist.
Doing so can help you process your anger constructively and enable you to get through this painful time in your life with confidence, clarity, and dignity. And you'll be better equipped to negotiate effectively and make smart decisions to safeguard your emotional and financial well-being.
Beware of coming to agreements with your spouse prematurely.
If divorcing spouses are able to effectively communicate, it can sometimes lead to better decision-making, quicker progress and a more cost-effective divorce.
But as much as communicating can sometimes be a positive thing, there are other times when talking - and more specifically making decisions before working with a chosen divorce professional - can do more harm than good.
In most states here in the US, the parties are encouraged to actively participate in the fair and equitable distribution of their marital assets and liabilities. But unless the parties are schooled in the financial matters pertaining to divorce, this can be a dangerous path to walk.
For example, assets and liabilities can each have different tax consequences and if not properly accounted for, a settlement that looks fair on paper may turn out to be favorable to one party and not to the other. This can happen when one party trades a checking account for a 401k, confusing pre-tax with post-tax dollars, or when there are stocks involved and neither party is aware of the cost basis of a given portfolio.
Let's face it. There's nothing pleasant about the divorce process so you'll no doubt want it to be over with as quickly as possible. And it might be tempting for you and your spouse to try to make as many decisions as you can as fast as you can before you start working with your chosen divorce professional(s). But given the financial complexities of divorce, there's a lot you "won't know you don't know" so it's important to take the time to do the proper discovery before you do any deciding.
Say you and your spouse decide on your own how you will divide an asset... You're both satisfied with what you've agreed to and both think it's fair. Then, you share this information with your mediator or attorneys and after a thorough discussion and review, it turns out the settlement you both came up with is actually unfair to you.
This is a very dangerous situation.
Think about it. Your spouse is happy with the result and is willing to fight for what was previously agreed to. While you feel like you got the short end of the stick and now want to renegotiate.
At this point, any trust that remained between you and your spouse will be gone. Your spouse believed you had a deal and now you're going back on your word while you feel like your spouse was trying to put one over on you and you think they're not negotiating in good faith.
So off to battle you'll go along with all your hard-earned cash...
To avoid this catastrophic mistake, wait for your chosen professional to give you all the facts and help you understand what a fair and equitable settlement really looks like before you make agreements with your spouse.
Don't have unrealistic expectations of what you can get/what you'll pay. Take time to learn the facts/realities.
The Internet is not a reliable source of information when it comes to calculating alimony or child support.
On one hand, there are the blogs written by already divorced people who share their stories about how much they got or how much they had to pay. Given that anyone can publish a blog, while some of their stories may be true, do you really want to trust your own financial future to someone who just has a need to vent and has no formal education in the financial matters surrounding divorce? And chances are, your settlement won't look anything like theirs anyway, because no two divorces are ever the same.
Next are the notorious child support and alimony calculators you find on the Internet. While it's true that all states are required to have a Child Support Guideline, they vary wildly from state-to-state. And they don't include all the expenses required for raising a child. So the number an Internet-based child support calculator churns out won't be accurate and a lot will be left out.
As for alimony calculators, most states don't have a formula. That's because in most states, alimony is determined by a complex series of factors that are taken into account to arrive at an amount. And not one of them is truly mathematical in nature.
But here's where it gets really tricky...
Some people go online and then fight to the bitter end because they believe they only need to pay or are entitled to receive what "Suzie's Blog" or the "free alimony calculator" told them. Now both spouses are at odds and their divorce battle drags on for years and costs a fortune.
Your best bet is to stay off the Internet and instead let a qualified professional give you some perspective and help you come to a fair and realistic settlement.
Choose your divorce professional carefully.
There's a good chance your divorce is making you feel completely out of control and with good reason.
You have no idea what you're entitled to for alimony, you're worried your kids won't get enough child support and as far as family finances go, you're in the dark as your spouse paid all the bills and managed the investments. So you're willing to take a back seat and put your financial future squarely in the hands of an attorney.
But is this really a good idea?
Attorneys are zealous advocates. It's their job to fight for their client, and their client alone. So it goes without saying that your attorney is going to do whatever it takes to make sure you get the more favorable deal. While at the same time, your spouse's attorney is going to do exactly the same and will fight to the bitter end to make sure their client gets the better deal.
Can you see how this will be a problem?
Because the more you fight, the more you'll spend on attorney fees and the more you spend on attorney fees, the less money there will be to fight over.
Instead of hiring lawyers as your first step, try divorce mediation. In mediation, a trained neutral third party well-versed in the laws and financial matters of divorce will help you and your spouse negotiate directly with the goal of reaching a settlement you both find fair.
And if for some reason mediation isn't a viable option, consider the collaborative divorce process whereby two attorneys agree to use cooperative methods instead of combative techniques to help you and your spouse settle your divorce out of court.
Both of these divorce methods are less expensive and can help you and your spouse avoid financially ruinous litigation.
Joe and Cheryl Dillon are co-founders of Equitable Mediation, a divorce mediation team that specializes in helping New Jersey and Illinois-based couples divorce peacefully, cost-effectively and fairly - without lawyers.
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
The Centralization of EU Competition Policy: Historical Institutionalist Dynamics from Cartel Monitoring to Merger Control (1956–91)
Laurent Warlouzet, Artois University describes The Centralization of EU Competition Policy: Historical Institutionalist Dynamics from Cartel Monitoring to Merger Control (1956–91). ABSTRACT: The contemporary strength of EU competition policy does not stem naturally and mechanically from the Treaty of Rome,...
20160526 - New York Council Approves Bills to Divert Minor Offenders From Court System
New York Council Approves Bills to Divert Minor Offenders From Court System
May 25, 2016
by J. David Goodman, The New York Times
2016-05-25
Baylor demotes Ken Starr, will fire football coach over school's handling of sex-assault allegations
After initially denying rumors that Ken Starr was on the way out as president of Baylor University in Waco, Texas, officials announced Thursday that…
10 Questions Live: Groundbreaking transgender judge talks bathroom laws
Phyllis Randolph Frye is the first openly transgender judge in the nation.
On Thursday, she talked with the ABA about recent bathroom laws as…
Men And Women Describe Their Very Last Night With Their Exes
The last night you spend under the same roof as your ex is almost always emotionally charged. Below, readers share what that fateful night was like for them.
1. "I had moved out of town and came back for court. We spent the night in a hotel together. It was sweet and sad. We still loved each other and I knew it but I couldn't convince him things would improve. Three years later we still talk a few times a week and he is my emergency contact." -- Sheila G.
2. "Awkward. He slept in the guest room as he had for the past five years." -- Shannon D.
3. "Silent." -- Imelda J.
4. "Heartbreaking, sad, peaceful, filled with gratitude for everything we had shared and been to each other." -- Melissa B.
5. "I couldn't stop crying." -- Gabriella C.
6. "Tense." -- Debra H.
7. "Unaware. I truly had no idea it was the last night." -- Alysha N.
8. "Cold War." -- Taleern L.
9. "Weird. I was leaving the country to go home and we both knew I wasn't sure if I'd be coming back." -- Tiffany W.
10. "Distant." -- Joey T.
11. "As friends, when we really were anything but. It was like being in the eye of the storm." -- Carol S.
12. "Intense and sad." -- Bree A.
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
Thursday, May 26, 2016
This Was By Far The Hardest Thing I Had To Learn After Divorce
If there's ever a time you need a little distraction in your life, it's during the divorce process. That's why we launched our Divorce Care Package series. With each post, we'll show you what things - books, movies, recipes - helped others relieve stress in the midst of divorce, in the hopes that a few of their picks will serve you well too. Want to share what got you through your divorce? Email us at divorce@huffingtonpost.com.
Blogger Jessica Kahan's 2015 divorce after 14 years of marriage brought a lot of firsts: her first time living alone, her first time going to a bar by herself and her first time cooking for just one person.
Below, the mother of two shares what those experiences were like and offers her recommendations to others going through a split.
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
GCR Women in Antitrust 2016 - call for nominations
See here for details for the GCR Women in Antitrust 2016 - call for nominations. The Big 3 (DOJ Antitrust, FTC, DG Competition) are headed by women. So many of the most important law firm lawyers, in-house practitioners, professors, economic...
20160524 - Nation's Criminal Defense Bar: The Continuing Collapse of the Case for Capital Punishment
Nation's Criminal Defense Bar: The Continuing Collapse of the Case for Capital Punishment
May 24, 2016
NACDL News Release
2016-05-26
Can You Change Your Name Back to Your Ex's?
The Kardashians are hard to keep up with, but Kris Jenner wants to make it easier by going back to the family name. It's a little strange because Jenner was not born a Kardashian. She become one through marriage...
Judge says sexual assault case against Bill Cosby can proceed toward trial
A suburban Philadelphia judge on Tuesday gave a green light for a criminal sexual assault case against Bill Cosby to proceed toward trial.
Charged with…
Monday, May 23, 2016
Blocked by Cuban officials, planned Havana meeting of global bar group suddenly shifts to Miami
Blasting legal groups in Cuba for their lack of support, an international bar group has notified members that a planned conference in Havana next month…
Kris Jenner's Defense For Changing Her Name Back To Kardashian Isn't Great
Watch out, world! Kris Kardashian wants to make a comeback.
The Kardashian matriarch, who currently uses the last name Jenner, revealed that she wants to take back her first husband's surname.
In a deleted scene from "Keeping Up with the Kardashians," the 60-year-old momager nonchalantly brings up the topic while she's riding in a car with her daughter Khloe. While explaining that she sometimes uses the Kardashian last name on the phone, Khloe cuts her mom's story short to say, "Your name isn't Kris Kardashian."
"I'm going to change my name back to Kardashian," Kris responds.
Clearly, Khloe isn't impressed with the decision.
"Why? You haven't been that in over 24 years."
Kris then reminds her daughter that she had the Kardashian name long before Khloe or her siblings, Kim, Kourtney and Rob, came along.
"I don't care if you were that, that's bizarre," Khloe snaps back. "Why don't you go back to your maiden name?"
Despite the fact that Khloe thinks Kris' decision could seem insulting to her youngest daughters, Kendall and Kylie Jenner, Kris says she doesn't think her maiden name "sounds right."
Then comes the kicker, which is, for lack of a better word, problematic: "If Bruce can change his name to Caitlyn, I think I'm good."
Sigh. A trans person changing her name to accurately reflect her gender identity and journey forward as her authentic self is not the same as you wanting to change your last name, Kris. But you do you.
This isn't the first time Kris said she was changing her name. In Season 6, Episode 3, the reality TV star told her then-spouse, formerly Bruce Jenner (who now goes by Caitlyn after coming out as transgender), that she wanted to go back to Kardashian, which naturally left her upset.
We can't keep up anymore.
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
20160523 - States caught in tug of war over whether cops can keep your stuff
States caught in tug of war over whether cops can keep your stuff
May 19, 2016
by Ashley Balcerzak, The Center for Public Integrity
2016-05-19
Are Settlements in Patent Litigation Collusive? Evidence from Paragraph IV Challenges
Eric Helland and Seth A. Seabury ask Are Settlements in Patent Litigation Collusive? Evidence from Paragraph IV Challenges. ABSTRACT: The use of “pay-for-delay” settlements in patent litigation – in which a branded manufacturer and generic entrant settle a Paragraph IV...
#USImmigrationLaw: What Can a Notario Do and Not Do?
A notario, or notary public, is not a lawyer and cannot practice law in the United States. Confusion about what a notary public can do in the US is common for many immigrants, however, because in some other countries, notaries...
Tom Brady and NFL players union seek 2nd Circuit en banc rehearing of Deflategate ruling
When quarterback Tom Brady of the New England Patriots recently added superstar appellate lawyer Ted Olson to his team, it appeared that he might be…
Sunday, May 22, 2016
20160522 - New York Teenagers Dumped in Adult Jails
New York Teenagers Dumped in Adult Jails
May 21, 2016
by The Editorial Board, The New York Times
2016-05-21
Friday, May 20, 2016
It's not illegal to fire someone for being 'too cute,' Manhattan trial court rules
Attractive women are not a protected class under employment laws, even the expansive laws in place in New York City, the New York Law…
New Senate bill would block SCOTUS-approved rule change expanding DOJ's surveillance powers
A small bipartisan group of U.S. senators has introduced a proposed bill to curtail computer intrusions by the U.S. government.
Their Stop Mass Hacking…
A Letter to My Husband's New Girlfriend
We don't know each other yet but as you are now a part of my husband's life, you are also a part of mine. Its important to me that we start out on the right foot and can establish some kind of understanding as our lives may be tied together for years to come.
That man you're falling for, he was my big love. I meant my vows when I made them with him all those years ago. I had every intention of spending my life with him, though as you know, it has not worked out that way.
I am telling you this because I want you to understand that sometimes when I come to the door to pick up our daughter and I see you and him together in the home that we made, it is going to hurt. There will be times that I need to just pick her up and leave without the small talk. It won't be because I dislike you or I'm trying to be rude. It's just because I need to get back to my car and cry a little.
Please understand that I am glad you've come into our lives. I want him be happy. I tried to make him happy but neither of us were prepared for the changes that having a child brought to our relationship and we both ended up with a broken heart. I have never felt pain like I felt when I discovered that our marriage had been damaged irreparably. I'm not sure if he's told you how our marriage ended but please understand that it was awful for both of us and it is still quite raw, for me at least.
One thing I want to say straight out; I will not try to take him from you. I have come to understand that it is possible to miss something without wanting it back. I miss our family and our home but I also know that it could never go back to the way it was. I wouldn't want it to. We spent a third of our lives together and a lot of it was wonderful but it was never meant to be forever for us.
I get that I'm 'the ex' and you're supposed to dislike or resent me but I hope you don't. We have a few really big things in common, you and I. That man you love, I loved him too. Those things you see in him, I saw them too. That little girl who gives you cuddles and makes you pretend cups of tea, she's my whole world.
I love that she likes you. Please know that. I will never ever try to change that or prevent you from having a bond with her.
My baby has a great father. If you can bring joy to him and in turn to my daughter, that can only be a good thing. He and I, as we co-parent, will inevitably have times of frustration and we may need to 'have it out' or he may complain to you about things I'm doing. It's how we are and the challenge of the situation we find ourselves in. Know that I will never speak a bad word about either of you with my daughter and I ask the same from you. In fact, I may rely on you to be the safe keeper of that at times.
It's important for me that my baby has a team of loving people who genuinely care for her and want what's best for her. As a child from separated parents I can tell you that the absolute best thing for her is for those people to get along and work together, even when they may not always agree.
It might sound strange but I want for this separation to turn out to be a positive thing for her. She will always have two homes and most likely four parents. The step-parent role is not easy and boundaries can be tricky to navigate. My daughter's father has invited you into our daughter's life which means that even though the relationship is new, you are already playing a part in nurturing her. All I ask from you is to give her love, establish a bond with her, speak up about how you see things as we are first time parents just figuring it all out as we go, but please also respect our role and work with us to maintain the boundaries we set for her.
This is an emotional subject for me and I cannot expect you to understand or to empathize with where I'm at, but I guess what I really wanted to portray is just 'welcome'. Welcome to the team of people who are raising this beautiful, sassy, spirited and unique little girl.
I truly hope that you both build a beautiful new love that radiates over our girl. One of the best things a child can have is parents who love each other, and with a little luck and a lot of understanding, our girl will have double the love in her life.
That man you're falling for, he was my big love. I meant my vows when I made them with him all those years ago. I had every intention of spending my life with him, though as you know, it has not worked out that way.
I am telling you this because I want you to understand that sometimes when I come to the door to pick up our daughter and I see you and him together in the home that we made, it is going to hurt. There will be times that I need to just pick her up and leave without the small talk. It won't be because I dislike you or I'm trying to be rude. It's just because I need to get back to my car and cry a little.
Please understand that I am glad you've come into our lives. I want him be happy. I tried to make him happy but neither of us were prepared for the changes that having a child brought to our relationship and we both ended up with a broken heart. I have never felt pain like I felt when I discovered that our marriage had been damaged irreparably. I'm not sure if he's told you how our marriage ended but please understand that it was awful for both of us and it is still quite raw, for me at least.
One thing I want to say straight out; I will not try to take him from you. I have come to understand that it is possible to miss something without wanting it back. I miss our family and our home but I also know that it could never go back to the way it was. I wouldn't want it to. We spent a third of our lives together and a lot of it was wonderful but it was never meant to be forever for us.
I get that I'm 'the ex' and you're supposed to dislike or resent me but I hope you don't. We have a few really big things in common, you and I. That man you love, I loved him too. Those things you see in him, I saw them too. That little girl who gives you cuddles and makes you pretend cups of tea, she's my whole world.
I love that she likes you. Please know that. I will never ever try to change that or prevent you from having a bond with her.
My baby has a great father. If you can bring joy to him and in turn to my daughter, that can only be a good thing. He and I, as we co-parent, will inevitably have times of frustration and we may need to 'have it out' or he may complain to you about things I'm doing. It's how we are and the challenge of the situation we find ourselves in. Know that I will never speak a bad word about either of you with my daughter and I ask the same from you. In fact, I may rely on you to be the safe keeper of that at times.
It's important for me that my baby has a team of loving people who genuinely care for her and want what's best for her. As a child from separated parents I can tell you that the absolute best thing for her is for those people to get along and work together, even when they may not always agree.
It might sound strange but I want for this separation to turn out to be a positive thing for her. She will always have two homes and most likely four parents. The step-parent role is not easy and boundaries can be tricky to navigate. My daughter's father has invited you into our daughter's life which means that even though the relationship is new, you are already playing a part in nurturing her. All I ask from you is to give her love, establish a bond with her, speak up about how you see things as we are first time parents just figuring it all out as we go, but please also respect our role and work with us to maintain the boundaries we set for her.
This is an emotional subject for me and I cannot expect you to understand or to empathize with where I'm at, but I guess what I really wanted to portray is just 'welcome'. Welcome to the team of people who are raising this beautiful, sassy, spirited and unique little girl.
I truly hope that you both build a beautiful new love that radiates over our girl. One of the best things a child can have is parents who love each other, and with a little luck and a lot of understanding, our girl will have double the love in her life.
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
LGBT Protection Amendment Fails in Dramatic House Vote
Yesterday on the House floor in Washington DC, lawmakers took their cues from TV, after an amendment intended to protect LGBT rights was narrowly voted down. Shouting, "Shame! Shame!" Democrats blamed Republicans for extending the vote until it failed,...
Bertrand-Edgeworth markets with increasing marginal costs and voluntary trading: Experimental evidence
Jacobs, Martin ; Requate, Till study Bertrand-Edgeworth markets with increasing marginal costs and voluntary trading: Experimental evidence. ABSTRACT: Price competition with increasing marginal costs, though relevant for many markets, appears as an under-researched field in the experimental oligopoly literature. We...
Thursday, May 19, 2016
No liability for movie theater owner in Colorado movie massacre, jury decides
A Colorado jury on Thursday found no liability on the part of a movie theater owner in a lawsuit over a shooting massacre at an…
7 Reasons To Embrace Your Single Status After A Split
When you've been stuck in a dead-end relationship for years or even decades, the desire to rush into a new one is understandable. You're a relationship person, and being coupled up again just feels right.
But more often than not, giving yourself time to breathe on your own is exactly what's required to process the split.
Below, relationship experts seven reasons to stay single for a bit after divorce.
1. Sitting with the loneliness is ultimately good for you.
"Of course you feel lonely. After a split, your mind naturally focuses on your loss, even if you were the one who wanted out of the marriage. (This is why people have doubts even after leaving a toxic person -- the perception of loss pervades their thoughts.) You may think, 'I'll never find someone who loves me again,' but it's not true; you know that most people who go through divorce find love again. If your brain is arguing against that, argue back. Recognize that your perspective is skewed right now. Instead of concentrating on what you lost, focus on what you have gained." -- Cynthia Ackrill, a life coach based in Washington D.C.
2. It's important to reflect on what happened and the mistakes that were made.
"After a split, you may feel lonely or scared of what it means to be single again. But to really get over it, give yourself some time to reflect on what happened: your role in the demise, your partner's role in the demise -- this is all knowledge that can and will serve you well as you move forward (and one day, seek out new relationships). There are many lessons to be learned from a divorce, if you have the courage to reflect." -- Neely Steinberg, a dating coach based in Boston, Massachusetts
3. It's time to take your needs off the back burner.
"After divorce, it's time to re-embrace your real self, not the version of you that has been dealing with a failing relationship. Think back to all the times you have been at your best, even the very early years of your life. What were you doing, what kept you hopeful, happy, healthy? What parts of you have been neglected in recent years? Nurture yourself in every aspect as you would someone dear to you who is grieving. What part of your self-care has been neglected? Take care of you."-- Cynthia Ackrill
4. You don't want to show up to your next relationship with unpacked emotional baggage.
"Like it or not, you have to do the work. You want to enter your next relationship standing tall, aware of who you are, what you offer and what you deserve. Take the time to get there. Otherwise, you'll meet people attracted to your broken and cracked parts. Being rescued feels great initially and is an amazing distraction but you really want to feel whole again and you can only do that yourself, without skipping steps. You've got this." -- Heather Gray, a Wakefield, Massachusetts therapist
5. Remember: You have your friends and hobbies to fill your time.
"See your friends, get out for exercise, pursue new activities or volunteer. At the same time, schedule time for you. Have a date with yourself. Read things that support and inspire you." -- Cynthia Ackrill
6. It's important to define who you are outside of a relationship.
"Sometimes in dysfunctional relationships, a person can become defined by that relationship. All their energy is focused on the relationship, the dysfunction and what their partner needs. When a relationship ends, it's a great time to put the focus back on yourself, to figure out what makes you happy, who you are and what makes you tick. You are no longer defined by a relationship that isn't working. You may just come out the other end a happier, more confident, more empowered, less burdened person!" -- Neely Steinberg
7. Once you've healed, you'll find someone who really deserves you.
"It's tempting to want to jump into a new fling when you're feeling heartbreak but it's just a temporary fix and a Band-Aid for a wound that is far too large to heal so quickly. It's better to take your time and really figure out what you have been missing out on, what you are currently attracted to and the kind of person who would be more fulfilling for you. If you do that in the initial stages of divorce, you'll just look for the opposite of your ex without thinking of other things you might need or want in a relationship that you hadn't considered before. It takes time to figure this out and learn what's out there."-- Heather Gray
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
My Son Is Not the Man of the House
Because we were mostly raised by a single mother, my brother was often instructed by well-meaning friends and family to "be the man of the house" and "take good care of mom." While he is now one of the most kind and thoughtful men I know, he also sometimes gives too much. I know as a child and young man he lived with a terrible sense of helplessness from being unable to make things better while friends and family suggested that he had some sense of responsibility to do so.
So, when I became a single parent and noticed people imposing these sentiments on my son (who was not even two years old!), I made the decision to speak up. "Take care of mom" and "you're the man of the house" are unwelcome directives in our world. My son is not the man of the house; he's a little boy! It's not his job to take care of mom; its mom's job to take care of mom. I say let him be little! The time will come for him to grow up, and it's not now. I won't even get into how sexist these comments are -- that's a whole other article!
I work hard to shield my son from the stressful aspects of my day-to-day life while also instilling a sense of responsibility and awareness in him. I want him to know that money is earned and that life requires integrity, effort and commitment. I also want him to have a carefree childhood; one where he spends hours learning about the caterpillars in our tiny garden without a moment of concern about anything else.
There's a balance, though, between providing too much shelter and instilling in him a sense of awareness for others. I think all parents walk that line every day. I don't want to raise my child to feel entitled or to be oblivious to the needs and feelings of others. I'm honest with him when I have a rough day. He sees me cry. He knows that being a one-woman show is not always a cake-walk--but he also knows absolutely none of that is his responsibility.
I believe that the best we can do in relationships is to take good care of ourselves and allow others the space to care for themselves, while supporting and loving them. I want my son to one day be able to choose a partner who is neither a taker nor a caretaker.
My boy knows to clear the table after dinner, to clean up his toys before bed and to put dirty clothes into the laundry basket. He knows that I will always listen to his stories, but that sometimes he has to wait five minutes until I finish what I'm doing. He has his moments of four-year-old crazy, but overall he is a kind and compassionate boy. So far I see no evidence of him worrying about me or our life, and I will do everything in my power to keep it that way.
I recently got hit really hard with a painful bug. Unable to do very little for a few days, I did my best to care for my son while making sure he knew that my health was the priority. I watched as he played independently, and then eventually brought his Transformers one by one to where I lay on the couch so we could play together. After a while he wandered away, returning with a cup of cold tea for me in his Star Wars cup. Then he was off to play again. It was a beautiful moment. He had been caring and kind, and also respectful of my need to rest. He didn't feel the need to make everything ok, but he was compassionate enough to think of bringing me some tea.
Parenting is so complex and so ever-changing. I'm sure I make so many mistakes just trying to keep up. We all do the best we can and hope that our kids come out relatively unscathed. My hope is that my son will always see his mother as someone who is human and fallible, but also capable of handling the speed bumps of life. So, from one single mom to the world: enough with this "Man of the House" stuff! Let our boys be little! We've got this.
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
20160519 - Justice Officials; Legal Luminaries Petition Government To Rectify Rubashkin Travesty
Justice Officials; Legal Luminaries Petition Government To Rectify Rubashkin Travesty
May 18, 2016
by Debbie Maimon, Yated Ne'eman
2016-05-18
Hinshaw announces management shake-up, new 'category killer' focus
Long known as a top defense firm for insurance-coverage matters, including the defense of attorneys in legal malpractice claims, Chicago-based Hinshaw & Culbertson in more…
Entry Regulations, Welfare and Determinants of Market Structure
Maican, Florin (University of Gothenburg) ; Orth, Matilda (Research Institute of Industrial Economics (IFN)) examine Entry Regulations, Welfare and Determinants of Market Structure. ABSTRACT: We use a dynamic oligopoly model of entry and exit with store-type differentiation to evaluate how...
Wednesday, May 18, 2016
9 Conversations Married Men Dread Having, According To Therapists
What conversations do guys really wish they could avoid having with their spouses?
Below, marriage therapists share nine things men complain about when they're in their offices.
1. “I know it's late, but we need to talk...”
The next time something needs to be addressed, save the conversation for the morning, said Elisabeth J. LaMotte, a psychotherapist and founder of the DC Counseling and Psychotherapy Center. "We need to talk" conversations tend to be of a higher quality if you wait until you're both well rested and ready to talk.
"The tension between women wanting to talk and men wanting to sleep is the stuff of old T.V. sitcoms," she said. "Still, these days, there really is an epidemic of sleep-deprived couples lacking adequate communication."
2. "Those shorts make you look like a teenager. Maybe you should wear something else?"
You dislike it when your spouse makes snide remarks about your new haircut or favorite baggy shirt. He probably feels the same way when you side-eye his new cargo pants, said Susan Heitler, a psychologist based in Denver, Colorado.
"Who are you to set the standard of dress for him?" she said. "And 'you should' is a sure way to invite him to feel that you're being too controlling."
3. "I would have preferred if you just got me a card!"
It's the thought that counts with gifts, right? Still, chances are, your S.O. really thought buying that pricey handbag the Macy's salesperson pushed on him was thoughtful and generous. Acknowledge it with a simple "thank you," even if you're thinking, "That price tag! You shouldn't have," said M. Gary Neuman, a psychotherapist based in Miami Beach, Florida.
"Men like to feel like winners in their spouses' eyes and get disheartened when they make attempts that are not met with enthusiasm," Neuman said. "A spouse is better off being gracious and appreciative and then later outlining gestures that would be more meaningful."
4. "My ex would never do that."
Comparisons to exes only breeds contempt, said Kurt Smith, a therapist who specializes in counseling men.
"It's not uncommon for husbands to be living in the shadow of their partners' exes," he said. "But there are probably good reasons why you're no longer with those other guys. Comparing your partner to your exes or to a best friend's partner or even to 'The Bachelor' is unfair and makes men feel unloved."
5. "Ugh, I hate how you leave the dishes in the sink."
You may want your spouse to be a little more diligent about the dishes or wish he'd slow down when driving, but there's a right and wrong way to issue your complaint, reminded Tammy Nelson, a sex and relationship therapist and the author of The New Monogamy. Who wants to hear non-constructive criticism, whether you're a man or woman?
"Instead, use phrases that show appreciation for what he could do right," she said. "Say 'I appreciate it when you do it this way instead' or 'I love when you rub my back softly.' Always remember, you get more of what you appreciate."
6. "All you want is sex."
Yes, sex is a huge motivator in our lives but you're insulting your spouse by assuming he's only lending a hand in the hopes of it leading to sex, said Neuman.
"Men do enjoy and desire sex but they hate when they're trying to do something nice for their spouse and are suspected of ulterior motives," he said. "It may even be true at the moment, but it doesn't mean that it's the only reason they do stuff."
7. “You never take out the trash. You always just let it pile up.”
The trash is a placeholder for just about anything here. The important thing to note is that using all-encompassing, accusatory blanket terms like “never” and “always" is a very bad idea, said Nelson.
"No one ever does anything 'always' or 'never' so take those two words out of your vocabulary," she said. "Keep the conversation focused on what is happening now and avoid words that lump behavior into such huge categories."
8. “Yes, but..."
Agreeing with something, then adding "yes, but..." dismisses everything said before it, Heitler said.
"But deletes whatever came before," she said. "No man (or woman) likes to have what he or she said dismissed like that."
9. "Remember when you made that one mistake, seven years ago?"
Maybe your partner forgot your anniversary a few years back. Maybe he made plans with his buddies on a weekend when you were headed to your parents. Whatever the case may be -- whatever the mistake was -- if you've forgiven him for doing it in the past, do your relationship a favor and let it go, said Smith.
"A lot of guys feel like they can never escape their past because their wife never forgets about any mistake they've ever made," he said. "And they hear about every one of those mistakes every single time they screw up."
The reality is, said Smith, "when a man feels like he never gets validated or appreciated for what he does right it usually leads him to tune his wife out."
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
Is Hillary an Enabler?
With the election only 5 months away, Donald Trump is planning to pull out the big guns to deal with "Crooked Hillary." He tells us, "He hasn't even started on her yet." But he's given us a preview.
Trump will place a laser focus on Bill's past indiscretions, accusing him of abusing and disrespecting women. Then, he'll attack Hillary for enabling Bill- standing by him, not putting an end to their sham of a marriage. Hillary has hinted that she plans on taking "the high road," ignoring Trump's personal attacks.
I say, "In life, when given lemons, make lemonade."
Here are the facts about infidelity. Although many people tell themselves, "If my spouse ever has an affair, I'm out of this marriage," the truth is, most people don't leave. Although usually shell-shocked and traumatized shortly after the discovery of an affair, when the dust settles a bit, the reality of what to do next comes into focus. And there's a lot to consider.
Frequently, couples have kids. Divorce means breaking up the family. It generally entails moving to new geographical locations and making necessary adjustments such as sending children to new schools.
Many couples dealing with infidelity have been married for decades; they have a long history together. Despite the recent crisis, they've weathered countless life challenges together. People often say that the hardest part about splitting up is letting go of a shared history.
Then, there are financial considerations. Divorce means splitting resources. Lifestyles change.
What about extended family and friends? A couple's divorce touches many people's lives. Their social network is never the same. People take sides. Friends disappear. Extended family often grieve.
Some betrayed people feel that getting out of the marriage will relieve them of the pain of the affair. But whether married or divorced, the pain of infidelity doesn't disappear without considerable work.
As a marriage therapist specializing in helping couples heal from infidelity, I can tell you that people who choose to stay in their marriages and work through feelings of betrayal, devastation, hurt, anger and loss as a team are courageous and strong.
There's no shame in staying. People who do the work on their relationships and come out the other side are truly warriors. They value love, commitment and marriage. To that I say, "Bravo."
And Hillary is not exception. Though she's a politician, she's still a person. She's still a mother and family member. I imagine she felt the same tormenting ambivalence any woman feels when her life goes haywire. It's unfortunate Bill's choices were so public and therefore so incredibly humiliating. She faced the dilemma millions of women face each year when their husbands stray- deciding how to piece their lives back together again- only she did it with everyone watching.
Rather than ignore Trump's indictment of her so-called, "enabling behavior," I'd advise Hillary to "bring it on." Her decision to stay, rather than enabling Bill, was a comment on her own core values- she prioritized marriage and family. She decided to stay the course.
Is this a weakness? I think not. Staying and working through difficult emotions is often more challenging than leaving when the going gets rough. But Trump wouldn't know that. Would he? Hopefully, for him, the third time's a charm.
Trump will place a laser focus on Bill's past indiscretions, accusing him of abusing and disrespecting women. Then, he'll attack Hillary for enabling Bill- standing by him, not putting an end to their sham of a marriage. Hillary has hinted that she plans on taking "the high road," ignoring Trump's personal attacks.
I say, "In life, when given lemons, make lemonade."
Here are the facts about infidelity. Although many people tell themselves, "If my spouse ever has an affair, I'm out of this marriage," the truth is, most people don't leave. Although usually shell-shocked and traumatized shortly after the discovery of an affair, when the dust settles a bit, the reality of what to do next comes into focus. And there's a lot to consider.
Frequently, couples have kids. Divorce means breaking up the family. It generally entails moving to new geographical locations and making necessary adjustments such as sending children to new schools.
Many couples dealing with infidelity have been married for decades; they have a long history together. Despite the recent crisis, they've weathered countless life challenges together. People often say that the hardest part about splitting up is letting go of a shared history.
Then, there are financial considerations. Divorce means splitting resources. Lifestyles change.
What about extended family and friends? A couple's divorce touches many people's lives. Their social network is never the same. People take sides. Friends disappear. Extended family often grieve.
Some betrayed people feel that getting out of the marriage will relieve them of the pain of the affair. But whether married or divorced, the pain of infidelity doesn't disappear without considerable work.
As a marriage therapist specializing in helping couples heal from infidelity, I can tell you that people who choose to stay in their marriages and work through feelings of betrayal, devastation, hurt, anger and loss as a team are courageous and strong.
There's no shame in staying. People who do the work on their relationships and come out the other side are truly warriors. They value love, commitment and marriage. To that I say, "Bravo."
And Hillary is not exception. Though she's a politician, she's still a person. She's still a mother and family member. I imagine she felt the same tormenting ambivalence any woman feels when her life goes haywire. It's unfortunate Bill's choices were so public and therefore so incredibly humiliating. She faced the dilemma millions of women face each year when their husbands stray- deciding how to piece their lives back together again- only she did it with everyone watching.
Rather than ignore Trump's indictment of her so-called, "enabling behavior," I'd advise Hillary to "bring it on." Her decision to stay, rather than enabling Bill, was a comment on her own core values- she prioritized marriage and family. She decided to stay the course.
Is this a weakness? I think not. Staying and working through difficult emotions is often more challenging than leaving when the going gets rough. But Trump wouldn't know that. Would he? Hopefully, for him, the third time's a charm.
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
Can You Get in Trouble for Posting an Ex's Secrets on Social Media?
Don't get mad, as the saying goes, get even. That sounds like great personal advice right after a nasty breakup, but it's not always great legal advice. While you may want to put your ex on blast on social...
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Actor and director Vincent Gallo filed a federal lawsuit against Facebook in Los Angeles on Monday, contending that the social media Goliath has refused his…
20160518 - Lack of Adequate Health Care is a Death Sentence for Arizona Inmates
Lack of Adequate Health Care is a Death Sentence for Arizona Inmates
May 17, 2016
by Elizabeth Stuart, Phoenix New Times
2016-05-17
Tuesday, May 17, 2016
7 Ways You Can Damage Your Kids By Staying In A Bad Marriage
When you're getting a divorce, there's no real way of knowing to what extent your decision will affect the kids.
Still, if your marriage has created a toxic home environment, they're probably better off getting some distance from it, said Rosalind Sedacca, a divorce and parenting coach and the author of How Do I Tell the Kids about the Divorce?
"Having been raised by parents that chose to stay together in a miserable marriage, I opt in favor of the other side," Sedacca told The Huffington Post. "For me, divorce is preferable to years of living in a home where the parents fight and disrespect one another."
Below, Sedacca and other child-centric divorce experts share seven reasons why divorcing is preferable to staying in an unhealthy marriage.
1. You may not be sparing your children emotional and psychological scars by staying together.
You may live under the same roof, but your nuclear family status means nothing if your kids are only used to seeing you fight, reminded Sedacca.
"Children feel the tension and are confused by it," she said. "The emotional and mental pain children endure when their parents are a couple in name alone doesn't get touched on enough; the scars are much the same as for those who experience a poorly handled divorce."
She added: "Happiness, harmony, cooperation, respect and joy are all absent when parents are emotionally divorced but still living together."
2. Your kids will feel uneasy in their own home.
Kids thrive on predicability. Chronic marital conflict undermines their sense of safety and sameness at home, said Deborah Mecklinger, a mediator and therapist based in Toronto, Ontario.
"Kids don't know what to expect in this situation. They walk on eggshells, never knowing where or when the next land mine will explode," she said. "Divorce, when done right, diminishes the conflict. Children have the opportunity to learn about respect, real cooperation and communication."
3. It may lead to low self-esteem for your kids.
A tension-filled home can leave even the most confident, sure-footed child feeling uncertain and rejected. Indeed, studies have shown that being raised in a high-conflict home can cause children to have feelings of low self-esteem and unworthiness, said Terry Gaspard, a therapist specializing in divorce and the author of Daughters of Divorce.
"Children are like sponges and they will absorb negative emotions and internalize their anger and shame," she said. "If they're exposed to parents who are chronically unhappy, kids will grow into adults who have low self-esteem and trust issues. An important question to ask yourself is, would the well-being of the children be enhanced by a move to a divorced, single-parent family? If the answer is yes, then a divorce can be advantageous."
4. Kids often feel responsible for their parents' happiness.
It doesn't matter how much you try to shield your kids from the unhappiness and lack of love between you and your spouse -- chances are, they'll pick up on it, said Betsy Ross, a Massachusetts-based psychotherapist.
"Even the youngest children can sense that you're suffering and that things are not right," she said. "Since children are naturally ego-centered and generally have the idea that they are more powerful than they really are, they are likely to think they've somehow caused your unhappiness and that it's really about them."
This isn't the message most parents want to convey, of course, but "it's important to recognize that your child may believe that your anger, disinterest or frustration is their own fault," said Ross.
5. Unhappy spouses are often less present as parents.
When it's a struggle to get along with your spouse, you may not be raring to head home to your family every day, said Mecklinger.
"Usually, spouses look to 'escape' unhappy marriages and avoid being at home in order to avoid their partners," she said. "They may work longer hours, spend more time with friends or use alcohol to avoid being present. Sometimes as a result of divorce, kids gain a parent."
6. You're showing your kids an unhealthy model for relationships.
Parents in high-conflict or extremely unhappy marriages tend to provide their children with an unhealthy template for romantic relationships in the future, said Gaspard.
"You're teaching them that it's OK to settle for less than they deserve in relationships," she said. "Children who observe their parents settling for a miserable marriage might become passive, depressed or pessimistic about their ability to love and be loved in a healthy intimate relationship."
7. Divorce can bring peace to the whole family, if it's handled correctly.
Co-parenting with an ex may not be how you envisioned raising your kids, but when the alternative is two incredibly unhappy adults parenting under the same roof, it may be your best option, Sedacca said.
"If children are being raised in a war zone or in the silence and apathy of a dead marriage, divorce may open the door to a healthier, happier future for everyone in the family," she said. "But only –- and this is the key point -- only if the parents consciously work on creating a harmonious, child-centered divorce that puts the kids' well-being first."
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
California's Gender Neutral Bathroom Bill
While some states have been suing the federal government for the right to discriminate against transgender people when it comes to bathroom access, California is going in the other direction. The same state that led the way on transgender student...
Does Alimony "Until Remarriage" Address Nonmarital Cohabitation?
Lack of thoughtful detail in judicial decrees involving alimony and future payments after divorce continually creates legal issues. To the extend one negotiates this language, one must be precise concerning how future payments might be funded (for example, presently financed trust funds administered by a reputable financial institution, or paid-up non-forfeitable life insurance policies held by the Court's Clerk, etc.). What events will alter the responsibility to make future payments (for example, death, retirement, disability, remarriage, cohabitation, etc.)? Always consult an experienced family law attorney in specific situations.
A recent Texas judicial decision concerning alimony payments involved cohabitation that fell short of remarriage. To provide context for this decision, the following is a brief explanation of informal marriage.
Approximately eight states recognize informal (common law), non-ceremonial (no marriage license or official ceremony) marriage. The largest of these states is Texas. Another group of states have grandfathered in informal marriages that were created prior to a statutorily designated date.
The state legislative trend for many years has been to abolish informal marriage since ceremonial marriage is readily available and the ceremony provides clear evidence of intent to be married. The historical reasons for informal marriage involved the difficulty in obtaining licensed clergy to perform a marriage ceremony in a rural area coupled with the old English legal rule that if one were not married in an officially sanctioned manner the children of the relationship were considered illegitimate and could not inherit their biological parents' property. Nonconformists to the official state church (be it Catholic or Protestant) faced significant problems that the legal concept of informal marriage helped resolve. It is frequently asserted that the English Marriage Act of 1753abolished common law marriage in Britain; however, this statute contained a number of exceptions including one stating that it did not apply to British colonies. Hence, common law marriage remained in early U.S. history.
Since judicial proceedings are required to obtain a divorce (no common law divorce), there may be a situation where an individual is still lawfully married to an earlier spouse in spite of having passed through several seemingly marital relationships. This has over the years created significant property and insurance benefit issues.
To address this confusion, some states otherwise allowing informal marriage have enacted legislation allowing an informal marriage to be recorded in the public records like a ceremonial marriage or requiring that the existence of an informal marriage be asserted within a period of years (perhaps 3) after cohabitation ended. Otherwise, the informal marriage does not exist. However, the easiest legislative solution is to simply abolish informal marriage.
The Texas Court decision involved an individual who had been ordered to pay $380,000 per year to a former spouse by a British court "until remarriage." He attempted unsuccessfully to assert the former spouse had contracted an informal marriage in Texas.
The decision under review (2:1) occurred on May 3, 2016, in the Texas Court of Appeals in Dallas (Assoun v. Gustafson). The original divorce occurred in London, England, in 1997 and, in a revised judgment in 2013, the London court ordered alimony payments of $380,000 per year. After a subsequent move the Texas, the former spouse sought a declaratory judgment that an informal marriage had occurred.
The Court noted that the Texas Family Code states "that an informal marriage may be proven by evidence that the couple agreed to be married and after the agreement they lived together in this state as husband and wife and there represented to others that they were married." [Texas Family Code Sec. 2.401(a)]. "However, it is difficult to infer an agreement to be married from cohabitation in modern society." Even an occasional reference to being married does not alone prove an informal marriage. Consent to be married cannot simply be presumed.
Here, the presumed Texas couple, living together, submitted to the Court sworn statements (affidavits) that they had never agreed to be married. The details of the affidavit are repeated in the Court's opinion. She indicated her homestead status in the connection with the sale of her home as single and declared herself as divorced on an auto insurance application. Tax returns indicating filings as a single person were attached.
An informal marriage was asserted by facts that the presumed Texas couple: lived together, she wore a ring on her ring finger, children called her "stepmom," and the couple occasionally indicated that they were married when registering at a foreign hotel.
The two person majority opinion found that the evidence presented failed to indicate a factual question concerning an agreement to be married. Hence, the majority upheld summary judgment (a decision without a trial) in favor of dismissing the lawsuit. The majority also determined that no addition evidence need be sought or produced. The dissenting opinion stated that the majority opinion only focused on the agreement to be married and not the total situation that should be heard by a jury.
This decision is another cautionary word concerning the critical importance of divorce decree language. Are there circumstances, short of remarriage, that should terminate alimony? Does the decree address cohabitation and how is it defined? Is there a time frame for living together short of marriage that triggers the end of alimony or spousal payments? What is the obligation of the estate of a deceased person who is paying alimony? To what extend are the payments a result of a property division? Is the divorce degree language subject to challenge in Bankruptcy Court? Are spousal retirement accounts subject to these claims? Thoughtful clarity on a broad range of issues is essential. Alternatively, one must understand the default judicial or statutory positions on these issues. Unfortunately, in many situations that end up in court, the questions appear not to have even been considered. A more generous interpretation is that the parties were eager to reach agreement and did not want "minor" details to prevent agreement.
Alimony in a majority of states is not a matter of right. Rather the judge has broad discretion in considering the facts and ruling accordingly concerning the amount to be paid. Legislation, however, may specifically address cohabitation and the obligation to pay alimony. Always consult an experienced attorney concerning a specific state's law.
State law varies concerning alimony payment obligations when cohabitation short of remarriage occurs. The following are four brief examples, two legislative and two judicial, that illustrate the diversity of state law. Of course, these are not all the variations.
The California Family Code states: "Except as otherwise agreed to by the parties in writing, there is a rebuttable presumption, affecting the burden of proof, of decreased need for spousal support if the supported party is cohabiting with a nonmarital partner. Upon a determination that circumstances have changed, the court may modify or terminate the spousal support..." (Cal. Family Code Sec. 4323). Note, however, that an agreement by the parties is typically upheld by judges, absent exceptional circumstances such as gross unfairness, fraud, or duress.
Massachusetts legislation provides: Alimony "shall be suspended, reduced or terminated upon the cohabitation of the recipient spouse when the payor shows that the recipient has maintained a common household ... with another person for a continuous period of at least three months. " (ALM GL Ch. 208, Sec. 49).
The New Jersey Supreme Court in a May 3, 2016, decision terminated alimony based upon this agreed divorce settlement provision: "alimony shall terminate upon the Wife's death, the Husband's death, the Wife's remarriage, or the Wife's cohabitation, per case or statutory law, whichever event shall first occur" (Quinn v. Quinn). In this case the former wife ceased her cohabitation during the trial and argued unsuccessfully that the obligation to pay alimony should only be suspended during periods of cohabitation.
A Utah Court of Appeals decision on Feb. 19, 2016, not only ended alimony but retroactively terminated the obligation to pay from the starting date of cohabitation, resulting in a judgment in favor of the ex-husband for the overpayment (Scott v. Scott). The Utah Court indicated that "cohabitation involves living together and being sexually intimate under circumstances akin to marriage," that in this situation had existed for two years.
This comment provides a brief and incomplete overview of a complex topic and is not intended to provide legal advice. Always consult an experienced family law attorney in specific situations.
A recent Texas judicial decision concerning alimony payments involved cohabitation that fell short of remarriage. To provide context for this decision, the following is a brief explanation of informal marriage.
Approximately eight states recognize informal (common law), non-ceremonial (no marriage license or official ceremony) marriage. The largest of these states is Texas. Another group of states have grandfathered in informal marriages that were created prior to a statutorily designated date.
The state legislative trend for many years has been to abolish informal marriage since ceremonial marriage is readily available and the ceremony provides clear evidence of intent to be married. The historical reasons for informal marriage involved the difficulty in obtaining licensed clergy to perform a marriage ceremony in a rural area coupled with the old English legal rule that if one were not married in an officially sanctioned manner the children of the relationship were considered illegitimate and could not inherit their biological parents' property. Nonconformists to the official state church (be it Catholic or Protestant) faced significant problems that the legal concept of informal marriage helped resolve. It is frequently asserted that the English Marriage Act of 1753abolished common law marriage in Britain; however, this statute contained a number of exceptions including one stating that it did not apply to British colonies. Hence, common law marriage remained in early U.S. history.
Since judicial proceedings are required to obtain a divorce (no common law divorce), there may be a situation where an individual is still lawfully married to an earlier spouse in spite of having passed through several seemingly marital relationships. This has over the years created significant property and insurance benefit issues.
To address this confusion, some states otherwise allowing informal marriage have enacted legislation allowing an informal marriage to be recorded in the public records like a ceremonial marriage or requiring that the existence of an informal marriage be asserted within a period of years (perhaps 3) after cohabitation ended. Otherwise, the informal marriage does not exist. However, the easiest legislative solution is to simply abolish informal marriage.
The Texas Court decision involved an individual who had been ordered to pay $380,000 per year to a former spouse by a British court "until remarriage." He attempted unsuccessfully to assert the former spouse had contracted an informal marriage in Texas.
The decision under review (2:1) occurred on May 3, 2016, in the Texas Court of Appeals in Dallas (Assoun v. Gustafson). The original divorce occurred in London, England, in 1997 and, in a revised judgment in 2013, the London court ordered alimony payments of $380,000 per year. After a subsequent move the Texas, the former spouse sought a declaratory judgment that an informal marriage had occurred.
The Court noted that the Texas Family Code states "that an informal marriage may be proven by evidence that the couple agreed to be married and after the agreement they lived together in this state as husband and wife and there represented to others that they were married." [Texas Family Code Sec. 2.401(a)]. "However, it is difficult to infer an agreement to be married from cohabitation in modern society." Even an occasional reference to being married does not alone prove an informal marriage. Consent to be married cannot simply be presumed.
Here, the presumed Texas couple, living together, submitted to the Court sworn statements (affidavits) that they had never agreed to be married. The details of the affidavit are repeated in the Court's opinion. She indicated her homestead status in the connection with the sale of her home as single and declared herself as divorced on an auto insurance application. Tax returns indicating filings as a single person were attached.
An informal marriage was asserted by facts that the presumed Texas couple: lived together, she wore a ring on her ring finger, children called her "stepmom," and the couple occasionally indicated that they were married when registering at a foreign hotel.
The two person majority opinion found that the evidence presented failed to indicate a factual question concerning an agreement to be married. Hence, the majority upheld summary judgment (a decision without a trial) in favor of dismissing the lawsuit. The majority also determined that no addition evidence need be sought or produced. The dissenting opinion stated that the majority opinion only focused on the agreement to be married and not the total situation that should be heard by a jury.
This decision is another cautionary word concerning the critical importance of divorce decree language. Are there circumstances, short of remarriage, that should terminate alimony? Does the decree address cohabitation and how is it defined? Is there a time frame for living together short of marriage that triggers the end of alimony or spousal payments? What is the obligation of the estate of a deceased person who is paying alimony? To what extend are the payments a result of a property division? Is the divorce degree language subject to challenge in Bankruptcy Court? Are spousal retirement accounts subject to these claims? Thoughtful clarity on a broad range of issues is essential. Alternatively, one must understand the default judicial or statutory positions on these issues. Unfortunately, in many situations that end up in court, the questions appear not to have even been considered. A more generous interpretation is that the parties were eager to reach agreement and did not want "minor" details to prevent agreement.
Alimony in a majority of states is not a matter of right. Rather the judge has broad discretion in considering the facts and ruling accordingly concerning the amount to be paid. Legislation, however, may specifically address cohabitation and the obligation to pay alimony. Always consult an experienced attorney concerning a specific state's law.
State law varies concerning alimony payment obligations when cohabitation short of remarriage occurs. The following are four brief examples, two legislative and two judicial, that illustrate the diversity of state law. Of course, these are not all the variations.
The California Family Code states: "Except as otherwise agreed to by the parties in writing, there is a rebuttable presumption, affecting the burden of proof, of decreased need for spousal support if the supported party is cohabiting with a nonmarital partner. Upon a determination that circumstances have changed, the court may modify or terminate the spousal support..." (Cal. Family Code Sec. 4323). Note, however, that an agreement by the parties is typically upheld by judges, absent exceptional circumstances such as gross unfairness, fraud, or duress.
Massachusetts legislation provides: Alimony "shall be suspended, reduced or terminated upon the cohabitation of the recipient spouse when the payor shows that the recipient has maintained a common household ... with another person for a continuous period of at least three months. " (ALM GL Ch. 208, Sec. 49).
The New Jersey Supreme Court in a May 3, 2016, decision terminated alimony based upon this agreed divorce settlement provision: "alimony shall terminate upon the Wife's death, the Husband's death, the Wife's remarriage, or the Wife's cohabitation, per case or statutory law, whichever event shall first occur" (Quinn v. Quinn). In this case the former wife ceased her cohabitation during the trial and argued unsuccessfully that the obligation to pay alimony should only be suspended during periods of cohabitation.
A Utah Court of Appeals decision on Feb. 19, 2016, not only ended alimony but retroactively terminated the obligation to pay from the starting date of cohabitation, resulting in a judgment in favor of the ex-husband for the overpayment (Scott v. Scott). The Utah Court indicated that "cohabitation involves living together and being sexually intimate under circumstances akin to marriage," that in this situation had existed for two years.
This comment provides a brief and incomplete overview of a complex topic and is not intended to provide legal advice. Always consult an experienced family law attorney in specific situations.
-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
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The 10 Easy Steps Women Can Take To Find Love After 50
For most women, finding the right guy after 50 can be frustrating and tiresome.
I've found the women who get out there and have the most fun attracting and meeting Quality Men have these 10 traits in common.
#1...Women who are happily dating feel really great about themselves.
They lead active lives that make them exciting, passionate and interesting to men. This woman will make space for a man and the life they'll lead together without giving up herself and all the activities in her own life just to please him.
#2...They know how to get in touch with their girly-girlness
Aka ... their true feminine power, which has men jumping at the chance to date them. Here's the key to knowing how girly-girl you are ... Do you want the man in your life to respect or cherish you above all? If you said cherish, you're are probably in touch with your inner girly-girl.
#3...Women who know and speak the language men can hear have a huge advantage over other women out there.
If you share the types of stories with your guy that you'd share with your girlfriend, it's likely you'll lose him right off the bat. Men can't follow what your sister's best friend's husband did with his wife. Save that for processing over drinks on your girls' night out.
#4....Ever watch one of my favorite movies, "Gone With The Wind"?
Before Rhett Butler came along, Scarlett O'Hara could have written the book on how to let a man be a man. It didn't matter what a man did for her ... she appreciated him and refrained from criticizing or telling him how to do his job. Both of these are huge keys into a man's psyche.
#5....My clients who found great guys online had AWESOME profiles!
They had the type of profile that drew quality men in by using a story men could imagine themselves in. True, they worked with me on creating their profiles, which helped because I showed them what to do to weed out the guys they didn't want to meet.
#6...Women who meet good matches online are willing to look beyond the selfies, the motorcycles and the guys who post pictures with other women.
Online dating is one-dimensional, meaning you can't see how a man's personality and looks blend together to form a real person. You want to take the time to read profiles. Also look at the environment surrounding him in his picture ... it can also give you an idea of who he is.
#7...Women who have the most fun dating go on a date looking to meet someone new and interesting.
They don't do an interview and they don't check off an imaginary "must have" checklist that knocks guys off faster than you can drink a cup of coffee. There are good guys out there who could be your friend too. And who knows? Sometimes a friend can become the one. You'll never know unless you give that nice guy a chance.
#8...Women who date men who aren't their usual type find there are far more good men out there to date than they ever imagined.
It's easy to get in a rut, dating the same guy over and over again, just with different clothes. You're attracted to him not because he's good for you but because he feels safe and comfy like that old pair of shoes you can't seem to throw away.
#9...To be successful at dating over 50, you have to keep at it.
A BIG mistake women make is giving up on dating after five dates with five not so great guys. Keep getting out there meeting those new and interesting men we talked about in #7. Try new dating sites. There are a lot of niche sites out there that cater to different interests you might have.
#10...The women who have the most fun dating and meeting Mr. Right got help when they needed it.
They recognized they couldn't do it all alone. Whether they read my blog, coached with me one-on-one or in a group, what made the difference is they took action to get the advice they needed, and then used what they learned in our time together to meet the right guy for them.
You don't have to do this journey alone. Keep reading these blogs, read my book about dating and let me know when you're ready to talk about making a commitment to finding love this year.
Lisa Copeland is known as the expert on over 50's dating. She's the best-selling author of The Winning Dating Formula For Women Over 50 and her mission is to help as many women around the world as she can discover how to have fun dating and finding their Mr. Right after 50. To get your FREE Report, "5 Little Known Secrets To Find A Quality Man," visit www.findaqualityman.com.
I've found the women who get out there and have the most fun attracting and meeting Quality Men have these 10 traits in common.
#1...Women who are happily dating feel really great about themselves.
They lead active lives that make them exciting, passionate and interesting to men. This woman will make space for a man and the life they'll lead together without giving up herself and all the activities in her own life just to please him.
#2...They know how to get in touch with their girly-girlness
Aka ... their true feminine power, which has men jumping at the chance to date them. Here's the key to knowing how girly-girl you are ... Do you want the man in your life to respect or cherish you above all? If you said cherish, you're are probably in touch with your inner girly-girl.
#3...Women who know and speak the language men can hear have a huge advantage over other women out there.
If you share the types of stories with your guy that you'd share with your girlfriend, it's likely you'll lose him right off the bat. Men can't follow what your sister's best friend's husband did with his wife. Save that for processing over drinks on your girls' night out.
#4....Ever watch one of my favorite movies, "Gone With The Wind"?
Before Rhett Butler came along, Scarlett O'Hara could have written the book on how to let a man be a man. It didn't matter what a man did for her ... she appreciated him and refrained from criticizing or telling him how to do his job. Both of these are huge keys into a man's psyche.
#5....My clients who found great guys online had AWESOME profiles!
They had the type of profile that drew quality men in by using a story men could imagine themselves in. True, they worked with me on creating their profiles, which helped because I showed them what to do to weed out the guys they didn't want to meet.
#6...Women who meet good matches online are willing to look beyond the selfies, the motorcycles and the guys who post pictures with other women.
Online dating is one-dimensional, meaning you can't see how a man's personality and looks blend together to form a real person. You want to take the time to read profiles. Also look at the environment surrounding him in his picture ... it can also give you an idea of who he is.
#7...Women who have the most fun dating go on a date looking to meet someone new and interesting.
They don't do an interview and they don't check off an imaginary "must have" checklist that knocks guys off faster than you can drink a cup of coffee. There are good guys out there who could be your friend too. And who knows? Sometimes a friend can become the one. You'll never know unless you give that nice guy a chance.
#8...Women who date men who aren't their usual type find there are far more good men out there to date than they ever imagined.
It's easy to get in a rut, dating the same guy over and over again, just with different clothes. You're attracted to him not because he's good for you but because he feels safe and comfy like that old pair of shoes you can't seem to throw away.
#9...To be successful at dating over 50, you have to keep at it.
A BIG mistake women make is giving up on dating after five dates with five not so great guys. Keep getting out there meeting those new and interesting men we talked about in #7. Try new dating sites. There are a lot of niche sites out there that cater to different interests you might have.
#10...The women who have the most fun dating and meeting Mr. Right got help when they needed it.
They recognized they couldn't do it all alone. Whether they read my blog, coached with me one-on-one or in a group, what made the difference is they took action to get the advice they needed, and then used what they learned in our time together to meet the right guy for them.
You don't have to do this journey alone. Keep reading these blogs, read my book about dating and let me know when you're ready to talk about making a commitment to finding love this year.
Lisa Copeland is known as the expert on over 50's dating. She's the best-selling author of The Winning Dating Formula For Women Over 50 and her mission is to help as many women around the world as she can discover how to have fun dating and finding their Mr. Right after 50. To get your FREE Report, "5 Little Known Secrets To Find A Quality Man," visit www.findaqualityman.com.
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